Category Archives: relationship with God

I know God loves me, BUT….

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Something I’ve noticed over the years is how many of my clients have “Father love” issues.  Maybe that isn’t the reason they come to me, but how wonderful it is of the Lord to reveal it!

That can only mean He has a desire and a plan to DEEPEN AND EXPAND their view of Him!  It’s pretty amazing how a restricted or inaccurate view of the Father can subtly interfere with the quality of our lives!

Have you ever said, “I know God loves me, but….”?

Check out what comes after the “but”. Often it will give you a clue as to where you may need an expanded view of the Father.

Many books have been written about the Father’s love and how we often get a distorted, or at a minimum, incomplete view of Him based on our earthly father.

If your earthly father was cruel, demanding, or rigid, you may feel an inability to ever please the Father, or maybe you often fear punishment or disappointing Him.

If your father was kind and compassionate, but didn’t do much to help you, you may have developed a “I have to do it myself” mentality, or you may feel at times like the Father isn’t going to help you.

If your father left when you were a kid, or was never really “there”, you might feel God ignores you or that you just aren’t that important to Him..

And then there are many permutations of those.

My point in bringing it up isn’t to find fault with your father.  That won’t serve you at all.

But it can help you to see where God wants to broaden your view of who He is to you.

This is part of having your mind renewed, and the word says we are TRANSFORMED by the renewing of our minds.I have found that when stressed I can get into doubt about whether God is REALLY there for me.

But rather than beat myself up, fall into a pity pot, or build up resentment, I have learned from the Lord to allow Him to show me some NEW OR DEEPER ASPECT OF HIM that I am not yet fully grounded in.

You know, the more accurate our view of the Father, the more we can actually FEEL His presence and involvement in our lives, the happier and more confident we will be.  Truly.

And because He is infinite, there is always more and more to learn.  How fun is that?!!

So, may I encourage you today to ask Him to show you more of His Father’s heart for you?

Decide to be willing to take any false notions developed or even programmed in you to the dump.No need to get into blame!  Just realize it “ain’t workin’ for ya,” and position yourself to receive what it is the Father wants to show you.

So… Here’s a little assignment for you:  Read Ephesians 1:17-2:5 and take note of how the Father’s heart is revealed here.

Write the passage, meditate on it, and ask the Father what He wants you to see.  I’d love to hear about it!!Have a richly blessed day!  Remember… it’s all in the seeing!

Maryann

Have I Ever Told You….
You’re My Favorite!
The Importance of Feeling Special
God wants you to feel special, and one of the best ways He does it is by giving you His favor!
Not convinced?
Get your copy today!

Go to : www.favoredbyGod.com
Available Now!

Your Perception of God Controls Your Life

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The more people I mentor, the more I am convinced that how a person perceives God controls every aspect of their life, especially how they view themselves.

The interesting thing is – despite this critically pivotal state of mind and heart,  most people have little awareness of how they see God.

And so, one of the first things I listen for is my client’s mindset about who God is to them.  This is often revealed in subtle ways, in the words they casually speak, when they they talk of their past experiences, or what their current struggles are.

Their mindset about who God is to them is formed from a variety of sources from growing up, to what they were told in school, to  what they see in the media, or while they’re out and about in the world.   Even what they are taught in church.   (Yes, I understand, people get nervous when I say those kinds of things.)  Slowly over time conclusions about God and a person’s relationship to Him get solidified to the point that they are never questioned, let alone challenged.

Over my many years of being a Christian, I have hit plenty of walls of frustration and fear. But in each instance, God had given me the opportunity to question and challenge my perception of Him, how He related to me, what He had in store for me, what His promises to me were — yes, you probably noticed a theme… ME.

But contrary to the saying, ‘it NOT about YOU,'”  I believe there are times when it has to be about me… and my mindset about God, which gives me my perception of Him, which will control how I experience what I am going through, and what choices I will make as a result.

Often the Lord has shown me that something definitely needed to be tweaked in my mind… I need the spirit of my mind to be renewed, rejuvenated, and often changed.  And He is faithful to do it.  The more I can see Him as Good, and Good to and for ME, the more I experience His goodness toward me.  This leads to greater peace, clarity, and confidence.  I am able to soar and rise above the difficulties, armed with new spiritual and practical tools and weaponry, all in the safe context of a loving God.

If you are feeling like things are not going so well with you, maybe it’s time to challenge your existing mindset. Ask God to show you what may not be working in your thought life, even in your subconscious.  Tell Him through writing or speaking… not just thinking, that you are ready to hear and see.  He is all about your success, freedom, and fulfillment.

God bless you, my friends.

Be Encouraged as You Approach This New Year

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

What is your approach to this new year?  Gleeful anticipation?  Armed with new resolutions? Ho-hum apathy? Down and out discouragement?

Whatever it is, I would like to pass on to you a passage our pastor encouraged us with yesterday.

1 Cor 2:9 “… as it is written, eye has not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for them that love Him.”

He then asked us the question, which I now ask you…

“Do you love God?”

“If so, then God has prepared things for you that you have neither seen, nor heard!”

What do you think of that?  Take a moment and breathe that reality in.

Now you may ask — but are they good things?

Years ago, there seemed to be a rash of teachings that promoted the mentality that if it’s something I don’t like or want to do, it must be God.


There was this thinking that God’s desires and our desires were at such odds with each other that surely, if it was pleasurable, fun, or easy…  it couldn’t be God.

Because of that many have turned away from Him, either within themselves, or in full out rejection.

God is a good God!  And this verse suggests good things are in store for those who love Him. (Notice it is not saying that bad things are in store for those who don’t.  We don’t want to go there!)

Here’s another verse that I’ve been meditating on recently, also mentioned in yesterday’s message.  (Don’t you love when that happens?)

Eph 3:19

Now to Him that is able to do EXCEEDING ABUNDANTLY ABOVE ALL that we ask, or think, according to the power that works in us…

God has prepared good things for you… exceeding abundantly above all you could even think!


And how will those things come to pass?  Through His power that is at work within you.

Meditate on this truth as you think about the new year.  Ask God to deepen it within you.

This is partly how we build a mindset of favor.

In a world filled with negativity and for many of us, a history of shame, guilt, and disappointment, establishing a new mindset of favor is essential to moving forward positively, effectively and in power.

God bless you!!
Maryann

How to Seek God

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Writing a book opens all kinds of doors.  And I love that.  More coaching clients, invitations to speak, seminars to present, and book signings to do. Opportunities to witness the move of God in the hearts and minds of so many new, as well as old friends.

I get so excited when the opportunity gets presented… and then, a few days, or the night before the event… a dread falls upon me.  I want to run away, disappear, and go into hiding.

At first, I thought something was wrong, or maybe I’m not supposed to do this, or…. and then, doubt about who I am takes over, and I even lose sight of why I’m doing this.  Quite frankly, it almost overwhelms me!

Has this ever happened to you, or is it just me?

And what is this dread about?

For me, imagined fears of being a failure, or being alone, of feeling like I’m ineffective, inadequate, and non-essential.  Old yukky thoughts still wanting to block and stop me from carrying out the mission God has placed within me.

But…ha-ha!   God is making me savvy.  I see the wiley ways of the enemy who stands to accuse and oppose me.

God is making me smart.  He exposes the plot, and reminds me who I am, and why I do what I do.


He shows me the thoughts that create the feeling of dread are not the thoughts of a highly favored woman of God, co-heir of the King, esteemed and deeply loved child of a Father who has said He would do “whatsoever” I ask.

He uses these times to train me, mentor me, and power me up.  I am then led to speak my agreement with Him.


“Yes, Lord, You are mighty and I am highly favored.  I am blessed to be a blessing.  In You, I am not a failure.  In You, I am not ineffective.  You have chosen me for such a time as this!  When I enter that arena, I will be full of Your love, wisdom, and anything else I need because You are faithful. You are already there, and at the same time, I bring You with me. Flow through me, and touch whoever needs Your touch.  I am grateful and excited to showcase Your love, Your favor, and Your energy.  Thank you for choosing me.”

Well, I am happy to report, the seminar I conducted after my last tangle with dread was sheer delight.  The Lord showed up in a marvelous way as He gave me the courage to transparently tell my embarrassing stories.   All the pieces of the study fell into place, and the ladies responded as baby birds, mouths wide open, hungry for what God was revealing.  It was apparent to all that He was there, at work, inspiring, motivating, and encouraging.  As a friend quoted from Veggie Tales, “I laughed. I cried.  It really touched me, Bob.”  Cute.

Consciously flowing in the favor of God could not happen if I did not “seek” Him.  Not some religious ritual, perfunctorily performed and then checked off, seeking Him is as simple as sharing our secrets with an intimate friend, or relaxing over coffee with a deeply interested relative.


And yet, there is a profundity to seeking Him, where He shares with us the inner workings of His heart and mind.  How secure He makes me feel knowing that every need I have, He has the answer and solution.

Where I once had difficulty carving out time to sit with Him because of all I had to get done, I now am so addicted to it, that everything else gets ordered around this part of my day.   Oh, how much easier, more productive, and satisfying life is!! For those of you who know what I’m talking about… let us rejoice together!

For the rest, oh, how I want that for you!

And so, I asked the Lord to speak to you today, and here is what He said,


“Come to Me as you are.  I know the details of your life intimately.   And I care about it all.  You don’t have to know anything other than I desire you and you desire me.  Sit with Me, and let Me show you My love.  Close your eyes, and look into Mine.  Do you see My delight for you?  You are My heartthrob.  You are My joy.  I know everything in your mind, your heart, your circumstances.. I know it all. I see the good in you, and all are trying to accomplish.  I see your fears, too. Come, let Me show you that I am on your side.

I desire to work with and through you, to give you ideas and what you need to accomplish them.  (I see the Lord lift up your face, and a radiant glow illuminates it, as He says…) I have things worked out for you.  Sit and rest awhile, and then follow my lead and I will show you the path.”

At that point the Lord held you close, until you were almost totally absorbed into Him.  Oh, the sweet satisfaction in His eyes as He held you!

How do we seek God?  Just show up, be ready to receive, and have a conversation.  He is waiting with eagerness and joy.


Have an amazing week!

Success is NOT what we think!

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Psalms 32:8: ” I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go: I will guide you with My eye.”

Last week I presented the question, “Are you made for success?” And hopefully after the post you pondered that question before the Lord, and determined that, “YES! I am made for success!”

But another question often arises and that is, “What is success, really?”

I hesitate bringing it up because I have seen tempers fly over this one… which is really just an indication that indeed, we all want to be successful, and when we perceive that desire to be threatened, well… we get kind of touchy!

Another reason for the defensiveness is… as much as we might desire success, we also have a fear of it … and while we might fear success, we also fear failure!

Quite a catch 22!  No wonder there are so many of us who are stuck in limbo!

Recently I had a discussion with my son about success because he was clearly frustrated.  For him, success was the “A+,” the 100%, being at the top of the heap, and staying there.  So, whenever things didn’t work out as he thought they should, he wore a big “F” on his forehead.

This mindset prohibited him from seeing what he had gained and contributed in each instance.  It made him feel like God wasn’t there for him, and that created more doubt and insecurity. Over a lifetime, this kind of perception can cause a person to just stop trying, hide away in bitter cynicism, or do something rash because of the frustration it causes.

Maybe you’ve experienced this same dynamic?

Well, after seeking the Lord about what success is, He brought me to some surprising conclusions!  “Success,” as used in the scriptures, isn’t the same as we typically think!

Isn’t true that when we think of success we think in terms of accomplishing something, like “get ‘er done?” Or we think of wealth or material gain or position?  God is not opposed to that at all, and truly, Deuteronomy 8:18 says that we have been given the power to get wealth so He may establish His covenant through us.  Please do not be double minded about this!

But as I read all 63 times the Hebrew word (sakal) for success is used, it is clear that there is a depth and richness to the word, that if we grasped it, we would charge for it. (If you want this list of scriptures, just email me.)  Given this definition, we can ALL be successful.

So…. what is it?

To succeed is to be instructed by the Lord and thus, think and act wisely, wittingly, and with true understanding!  It is NOT necessarily a goal point, a destination, or the achievement of something (though results are a good thing!).

Success is the PROCESS of hearing from the Lord, being instructed by Him, understanding His heart, knowing His call FOR YOU, (stop comparing yourself to others!) and then going forth confidently in wisdom, understanding, skill and strategy, picking up more as you go.

Now, I am all for results.  In fact, the Lord has made me more results oriented than I’ve ever been.  But my success is not determined by my results.  Indeed, my results flow out of my success.

I am reassured and comforted by the fact, that when I come to the Lord, sit with Him, and seek Him for His heart, mind, agenda, love, and the favor to fulfill what He wants to do through me, I can KNOW without doubt, that I am already a success.

Can I challenge you?  If you are not having regular times of sitting with the Lord, dialoguing with Him, and feeling His heart beat for you, do yourself a huge favor!   Ask Him to help you do it.  You will be so enriched, empowered, and elevated… and that is His will for you!

Next week, let’s talk about how to seek Him.

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For those of you who are interested in starting your own business or already have one… Mark you calendars!  November 30, 9 pm EST, I will be interviewed on an internet TV show, www.CelebrityCreators.com, where I will be discussing, “The Essential Mindset for Christian Entrepreneurs.” We’re going to tackle some daunting issues that hold Christians back from going forward in their purpose and what kind of mindset is necessary to meet all the challenges that accompany business. I’d love it if you joined us!

Be Happier! Tell God About It

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I’m always amazed when I read the word and see psychological/health principles vividly displayed.  Many think the word of God irrelevant, and yet more and more, current brain and psychological studies reveal what the Bible has been saying all along, specifically in this discussion:  For happiness and health, we need forgiveness.  Internalizing our fears and guilty feelings creates havoc in our minds and bodies.

Let me show you what I mean:

I discussed in the past couple of posts how Ps 32:1-2 points out a way to HAPPINESS, and that is to live in a perpetual state of a clean slate which is only obtained by believing at a deep heart level that God has already forgiven you.  It is NOT by trying to always be good! Further, because God holds nothing against you, you need not hold anything back from Him.

Feeling guilty carries with it the fear of punishment, and we do all kinds of things to avoid that… blame-shifting, denial, aggressive attacks.

On the other hand, some people accept all forms of guilt… they feel responsible for everything that happens, take the blame for it all, and subconsicously harbor a belief they deserve punishment, and the circumstances of their lives reflect that.  Read any basic Psy 101 course and this dynamic is sure to be examined.

Now venting, blaming others, and punishing others for the guilt we feel inside is not a healthy response.  But neither is internalizing it so your body gets bombarded with a steady stream of harmful chemicals triggered by persistent negative thoughts.

Listen what David says in Ps 32:3:

When I kept silence [before I confessed], my bones wasted away through my groaning all the day long.

Keeping our negative thoughts inside and not dealing with them in a healthy manner affects our minds and bodies in severe ways.

As a former neurotically guilty person, feeling responsible for everyone and everything, here’s what I have learned to do:

Tell God all about it.

I write daily letters to Him and when I need to, I share my deepest, darkest secrets and feelings.  I share my screwiest ideas, my stupidest questions, my greatest fears, and silliest offenses.

And guess what?  I not only have not been zapped, but also I feel and see His smile.

He’s never forsaken me.  He, instead, sticks close to me, enlightens me, clears up my confusion, and reassures me that He loves and yes, even favors me!!  I need not grovel because He is the Lifter of my head!

If you don’t have that kind of intimacy with Him… ask Him for it and try it out!  He will meet you, if you let Him!

To your good mental, emotional, and physiological health!

Guilt: A Barrier to Intimacy with God

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Yesterday we considered Ps 32: 1 – 2:

Happy is he who has forgiveness continually exercised upon him, who has a perpetual fresh start!  You’re slate is wiped clean!  God holds nothing against you, and so, you need not hold anything back from Him.?

Did you notice the latter part of that passage? “… so, you need not hold anything back from Him.” (The Message)

Often in my coaching, I guide my clients to check out passages in the word that offer proof of the heart and intention of God.  Without understanding more fully the love of God, it’s easy to get thwarted in receiving the desires of their hearts.

I ask about the nature and quality of their relationship with Him to see if they are trying to get to their destination or goal in a boat with no paddles, sail, or motor.  Crazy, but that’s most of us!

After we talk about this, invariably it is disclosed, sheepishly, that they rarely sit with the Lord for wisdom, strength, hope, or joy.  Why not?  They feel guilty.

Somewhere within, they feel God doesn’t really want to see them, or if He does, it’s to scold them.

They barely crack open the word, which is to strengthen their faith, infuse them with power, and settle their hearts.  Again, why not?  Because they perceive a big bony finger rising up out of the pages and shaking in their faces.  Who’d want that?

I know exactly how they feel.  Growing up with a highly critical parent, I developed the idea that being right about everything, not wrong, was the way to avoid punishment, ensure my worth as a person, and increase my superiority.  To have anyone point out I was wrong about ANYTHING was like taking a hot poker and stabbing an open wound.

Of course, I had an effective way of masking that this bothered me, and so, I’d internalize the criticism, wonder about its truth,  and be resentful toward them.  A double whammy to my soul.

Examine today if your guilty feelings are keeping you from the True Source of all you need and desire.  The answer is NOT to do everything right all the time so that you don’t ever feel guilty and no one can accuse you.  You can’t anyway.

The answer is NOT to grovel and do penance each time you want to go to Him. He doesn’t need or want that.

The answer is to accept wholeheartedly the open door to His heart for you.  There is nothing that stands in His way, and He doesn’t want anything to stand in yours.  You can tell Him anything.  Go for it.

Live Guilt-free! Happiness Tip of the Day

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Continuing on in my series of “Get Happy!” can we consider

Ps 32: 1 – 2?

Happy is he who has forgiveness continually exercised upon him, who has a perpetual fresh start!  You’re slate is wiped clean!  God holds nothing against you, and so, you need not hold anything back from him.  (combination of the Amplified and Message)

Did you know that this is for you, everyday? Not just when you became a Christian!  How we can mess things up in a day!

But one of the first favors God does for us is wipe the slate clean, and in His mind… it stays clean!

One thing I come across CONSISTENTLY as a coach and counselor…. Christians struggle immensely with guilt and shame.  Guilt and shame confuse and cloud a mind. There is no way we can effectively move forward in the purposes of God when we are held back by a guilty conscience and a shameful image of ourselves.

I’m not talking about a person who is pathological and feels no guilt or remorse for anything.  That is a person who has NO conscience.

I’m talking to the vast majority of Christians, especially women.  We sometimes think guilt is the way for us to ensure proper behavior, or keep us in line,  and then we pass that on to our kids! This practice opposes God… and thus, can not bring happiness.

I know this is tough… but believe God.  He has let you off the hook.  Do the same. And be HAPPY!

More Get Happy Tips!

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Again, God has given us another sure-fired way to be happy… and I know I’m not telling you anything new… but consider:  do you REALLY believe this?

Happy are all those who seek refuge and put their trust in the Lord.  (Ps 2:12 AMP)

Most of the people that come to me have some nagging relationship issue that is causing them sadness, stress, or terrible frustration.  Though the verse quoted above is truth, knowing it does not seem to bring the relief, let alone happiness, most people desire.  In fact, it can add increased pain as they struggle with guilt for not finding the rest and happiness it promises.

And yet, seeking refuge in any other way, i.e. the arms of another, clandestine cybersex, working massive hours to avoid the feelings of inadequacy at home or produce elusive financial security just distances them even farther from happiness. While most Christians don’t struggle (any longer) with drug or alcohol addiction for refuge from painful feelings, we have a whole host of replacements … some of which even look pretty darn good (high performance, never saying no, taking responsibility for others’ burdens, to name a few)!

Truth be told, many Christians don’t really know how to find true refuge or put their trust in the Lord.

What’s the problem?

Why is it so difficult to put our trust in the Lord?

Well, the answer is as varied as our backgrounds, what we’ve been taught about God, who we think we are to Him, what experience we’ve had when we’ve prayed, and what we have interpreted and concluded about all that.

One of the things I explore with my mentees is what are the possible beliefs lodged in their minds that keep them from putting their trust fully in the Lord.  After prayerful consideration, they always discover what it is.

God is faithful to reveal what needs to be revealed. Once the internal tapes that play in their minds are identified, we can begin to dismantle them by the power of the Holy Spirit.  Freedom is a happy thing!

So, today, why not ask God:

“Lord, what is in my mind, my belief system, or my memories that have created doubt in You?”

Then trust He will gently and lovingly reveal it to you.

He loves you and wants you…. HAPPY!